Have you ever meet a person who is always looking for constant admiration or who thinks that they are better than everyone around, but lose their temper when they are given slight criticism? They are a NARCISSIST.
In common language, narcissism refers to a troublesome personality that causes great distress for other people and sometimes even strangers. It is note-worthy that such people don’t have inability to function properly. Narcissism, in “subclinical” sense, can be thought of as a personality disturbance (or distortion) but not a disorder, which means, narcissism, in its subclinical manifestation, is a psychological condition that falls short of meeting the diagnostic criteria for the conforming clinical personality disorder. Something that is bewildering about narcissists is that he is very often in denial or ignorant of the suffering he causes others. One reason for this blind spot is that the narcissist’s behavior, which can cause great distress and emotional hurt in others, doesn’t seem to be a discomfort for him, not anything he can access or process in their mind.
If you are experiencing problems in your relationships, including strong feelings of jealousy and sensitivity to disapproval, preferring to keep yourself at a distance from situations and people who can make you feel bad, it is possible that you may have some qualities of a narcissist. People with narcissistic personality disorder are extremely resistant to changing their behavior, even when it’s causing them problems. It is in their behavior to turn the blame on to others. Here are some signs that will make you think that you are a narcissist:
Do you feel that you are better than other people? You may justify this feeling of superiority on the basis that you are better educated than most people, or that you have a better job or you think you are more attractive. In reality, being richer, more educated or more attractive than someone else doesn’t make you better, a narcissist is not aware of this.
If you are a vulnerable narcissist, you will always need praise from others in order to feel good about yourself. You need constant approval and recognition to boost up your self-esteem. This will make you spend a lot of time on yourself.
Do you feel you are allowed to act in particular ways and receive certain rewards like financial gain, without even putting the due efforts in that other people have to? You are a narcissist.
You get crushed by criticism. If you don’t get the praise you are looking for or in worse circumstances you are on the receiving end of criticism, you feel absolutely crushed. It is obvious that nobody likes to being criticized, no matter how well deserved the criticism is but for you, the pain of criticism runs so deep you feel gutted. Your ego is fragile and it can take a long time for you to move on from being called out by someone. You might never talk to them again!
Life can be difficult for such people. You can end up cutting yourself from the rest of the world, due to your feelings of superiority and feeling misunderstood. You might face emotional swings. If you have all these traits then a therapy can help you out.
by: Abeer Arshad